My dad told me once that he liked the idea of “The Fool” card in the tarot. He said that people look down upon the fool, because no one wants to feel foolish, embarrassed, ashamed. But the truth is that the fool is the one with an open heart, ready for anything. Unafraid of anything. It doesn’t always work out in the fool’s favor, but at least he (or she, in my case) is willing to try.
I was on the #1 bus, on my way to work one day and I had a book from the library. I found this quote so beautiful that I took a picture of it. It sums up how I feel about living in Austin—I changed so much, but somehow I didn’t change at all. I learned everything and yet I learned nothing. As if the past three years just made me more of my true self.
“O, how incomprehensible everything was, and actually sad, although it was also beautiful. One knew nothing. One lived and ran about the earth and rode through forests, and certain things looked so challenging and promising and nostalgic: a star in the evening, a blue harebell, a reed-green pond, the eye of a person or a cow. And sometimes it seemed that something never seen yet long desired was about to happen, that a veil would drop from it all; but then it passed, nothing happened, the riddle remained unsolved, the secret spell unbroken, and in the end one grew old and looked cunning . . . or wise . . . and still one knew nothing perhaps, was still waiting and listening.”
Narcissus and Goldmund